My #1 Crutch

No surprise. I hate reality TV. A matter of fact the only reality TV shows I even watched with some sort of regularity were the first season of "Average Joe" (Yeah, that was a big rip off.) The first season of "The Apprentince." (Omorosa is the new Whitney Houston!) That season of American Idol I was paid to watch. (The show makes me want to become violent.)

And "America's Next Top Model."

All those other shows, I could have taken or left. Sometimes I missed entire episodes. Sometimes they were just things in the way of my Law & Order episodes. But my life would stop Tuesday nights to watch Tyra Banks, a bunch of gay black men and Janice Dickenson run rampant over a gaggle of unnaturally tall, thin n' pretty girls' self-esteem. I did not miss an episode of the first two seaons (watched both repeats of season one), decided my interest was unhealthy and that Tyra and me needed some space, so I did not watch the third season.

But then, bored a few Tuesdays ago I flipped on UPN and saw that Tyra was back. It was the preimere episode of season four and I tried to change the channel but nothing was on except all those shows where the ugly guy is married to the hot wife and as soon as I saw Banks' gigantic signature forehead I was like, "Yeah. I'm watching this thing."

So yeah. I'm watching this thing. Whoo-hoo gay black men and Janice Dickenson! Crush those dreams!