Party like it's 1999
I'm not this good with a camera: Roger Hornbeck took this picture of Xander's downstairs nightclub.
In the name of journalistic sacrifice I spent the last three weekends doing nothing but going to local bars, restaurants and clubs for The Californian's "Bar and Club Review 2006." (I do this because I care, people.) Needless to say, I'm tired. Pooped. Exhausted. It was toture. Going to all those bars and restaurants. You just don't know!
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. I have the world's fakest job. I'm paid to blog, go shopping, go to shows and bars, then write about it. But you know? Sometimes I just want to stay home and read a book. I am a nerd after all. I enjoy the private pleasures of literature and film. I don't need to go to RJ's and get trashed with the trogdolytes. Not that it doesn't make good writing (or reading for that matter.)
But I'll stop kvetching now. I could be out in a field dying of heat exhaustion or be the person who has to clean the dead animal carcasses of the highway.
Anyway, the club review will be gracing the cover of this Thursday's entertainment section.
Also in this Thursday's Californian: WOTS and Vendetta Red lead singer Zach Davidson on what to expect at a Vendetta Red show
posted by Danielle Belton @ 9:13 AM
6 Comments:
At 1:42 PM,
Anonymous said…
So as entertainment/nightclub reviewer are you, like, required to proclaim this bar was great or this band really smoked even though it might have been the typical Kern sh*thole full of criminals and ho's, and the "music" some godawful gangsta thump or okie-chickin' pickin' or deathmetal-polka band?
I would be real honest and don't give a sh*t what the Gingerfornian editors/ad salespeople say: if it sux, tell the truth.
At 1:58 PM,
Danielle Belton said…
I pretty much call things as I see them. If a bar is rowdy I say it's rowdy. If it's fancy-pants, I say it's fancy-pants. With bars, they usually cater to a specific crowd so I knew that some of the bars I would hate would be beloved by others, so the review just tells people what they can expect.
Like in last year's reviews I pointed out that if you go to Riley's, The Mint or Guthries on occasion you might have to fight your way out of the bar. This year RJ's was the bar that made me wonder if some jock was going to spill his beer on some Rhinestone Rapper and cause all hell to break loose. And there are still two bars I haven't gone to (um ... sorry Trout's and La Movida) because, honestly, I'm too afraid to go there. I don't go bar reviewing alone and my co-workers just shake their heads and say, "Don't go there" when I mention those two esstablishments.
But I pretty much say what I think. In my archives someone's still complaining about me making fun of the rappers at the Nelly concert and I thought I was being nice. But I wasn't going to ignore the fact that literally, all the rappers at some point referred to women in a dehumanising manner and the sheep just happily cooed back at them like automotons.
At 3:51 PM,
Anonymous said…
Well-stated. Maybe you could tweak your article a bit, add some literary realism: Kern Bar Most Likely to be Mugged at (catch a disease at, buy drugs at, find a whore at etc.), Bar with most Appealing Sluts (or least appealing as it were), Most Obnoxious Pop-Rock-Rap-Country muzak of Bako award, Most Hideous Bartender/B-girl/bouncer of Bako contest, etc.
At 9:44 AM,
Anonymous said…
"Like", some people are just never satisfied- they all pretty much dont give a sh*t and only have negative sh*t to say. that "sux"....um...yeah-well put.
At 10:44 AM,
Anonymous said…
that's right...i'm mr. negative, here to tell the real truth about B-field: it's stinky, filthy hellhole full of deviants, criminals, and the cheap sluts who phuck 'em...the bars are more or less murderer's dens, but the hicks and gangsta-scum who go there don't even have the intelligence of a bright LA or SF hell's angel member........and guess what? even the cops and judges and other professionals are corrupt bags of shit as well..that's for starters...if DB, the Gingerfornian's own "yes gal," doesn't care for that she can delete it
At 11:34 PM,
Anonymous said…
Hey Anonymous dude. Get laid and mellow out. Momma says.
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